Star Trek: The Nerdification of Barrin

by **Sara Stanton** » Wed Apr 11, 2012 5:08 pm

THE FRONT

Oh no, Earth!

Also, where the fuck in San Francisco does it look like that? xD

Red Shirt Count: 79 (+27, Politicians count as redshirts)
Actual Death Count: 5
Ripped Shirt/Bare Chest Count: 11.5
Cameo Count: 3
Shut Up Wesley Count: 5

by **Will Stanton** » Wed Apr 11, 2012 5:54 pm

And, gotta finish that 2-parter: DS9 4x12: Paradise Lost or DAS VERLORENE PARADIES

Noooo, CGI Beardy Admiral!

by **Sara Stanton** » Wed Apr 11, 2012 5:58 pm

THE LOST PARADISE

Remember kids, being scared is letting the terrorists win! But yeah, pretty good episode/two-parter. Though I'm starting to wonder if Starfleet has ANY non-terrible Admirals.

Red Shirt Count: 105 (+26, The Defiant is one mean shootin' machine)
Actual Death Count: 5
Ripped Shirt/Bare Chest Count: 11.5
Cameo Count: 3
Shut Up Wesley Count: 5

by **Will Stanton** » Wed Apr 11, 2012 6:51 pm

Moving on to season 5, and the end of the Klingon War! DS9 5x01: Apocalypse Rising or DIE APOKALYPSE DROHT

As the Klingon tailor would say, Today is a Good Day to Dye!

by **Sara Stanton** » Wed Apr 11, 2012 6:54 pm

THE APOCALYPSE LOOMS

Rahr! Klingons! Still kinda silly but that's Klingons, I guess. I'm liking the overarhing story though.

by **Will Stanton** » Thu Apr 12, 2012 10:39 am

Gotta continue...wait, no, timmmmeee waaaaarppppppp
DS9 5x06: Trials and Tribble-ations or IMMER DIE LAST MIT DEN TRIBBLES

God, Dax, take a PILL.

by **Sara Stanton** » Thu Apr 12, 2012 10:53 am

ALWAYS THE BURDEN WITH THE TRIBBLES

Weee! Time travel! To... the Tribbles. God damnit random Klingon "disguised as a human".

Red Shirt Count: 105
Actual Death Count: 5
Ripped Shirt/Bare Chest Count: 11.5
Cameo Count: 10 (+7 from all the important Enterprise people (where's Sulu?) and then dozens of background chars)
Shut Up Wesley Count: 5

by **Will Stanton** » Thu Apr 12, 2012 2:17 pm

Back to plottyness! DS9 5x14 In Purgatory's Shadow OR DIE SCHATTEN DER HÖLLE

Uniform distinction!

by **Sara Stanton** » Thu Apr 12, 2012 2:27 pm

THE SHADOWS OF HELL

dun Dun DUN! Shit just got real. Again.

by **Will Stanton** » Thu Apr 12, 2012 4:39 pm

Very next episode! DS9 5x15: By Inferno's Light or IM LICHTE DES INFERNOS

And he would have gotten away with it, too, if it wasn't for those pesky Breen

by **Sara Stanton** » Thu Apr 12, 2012 4:42 pm

Man, I feel like they owe me a gigantic space-battle. That plan was pretty awesome though, I almost feel bad for the ~~race of Wills~~ Dominion.

Red Shirt Count: 107 (+2 random prisoners)
Actual Death Count: 5
Ripped Shirt/Bare Chest Count: 11.5
Cameo Count: 10
Shut Up Wesley Count: 5

by **Will Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 7:41 am

It's just a jump to the left...
DS9 5x22: Children of Time or KINDER DER ZEIT

This plot has never been used elsewhere.

by **Sara Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 7:43 am

At least Taliesin was never directly responsible for erasing his own time-line for selfish reasons. >_>

Theoretical Redshirt Count: 8000

by **Will Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 8:47 am

And now we begin a big stretch of episodes in a row, with DS9 5x25: In the Cards or DIE KARTE

QUEST CHAIN: THE EPISODE

by **Sara Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 8:50 am

THE CARD

Okay episode. It almost seemed a little too silly in front of the serious backdrop of war so I dunno.

by **Will Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 9:51 am

And we might as well get to the end of Season 5: DS9 5x26: Call to Arms or ZU DEN WAFFEN!

SHIT, my baseball!

by **Sara Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 9:56 am

TO THE WEAPONS

Well then, shit be getting serious again. The increased CGI budget/effectiveness sure as hell is noticable in DS9.

Red Shirt Count: 110 (+3 random console explosions)
Actual Death Count: 5
Ripped Shirt/Bare Chest Count: 11.5
Cameo Count: 10
Shut Up Wesley Count: 5

by **Will Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 10:45 am

We can't stop now! Push on to DS9 6x01: A Time to Stand or ZEIT DES WIDERSTANDS!

Shut up, ~~Wesley~~ Jake

by **Sara Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 10:58 am

TIME OF RESISTANCE

He who controls the ~~Spice~~ Ketracel White controls the ~~universe~~ Alpha Quadrant.
And next week on Deep Space Nine, the plot of Voyager, only condensed and, I assume, less stupid.

Red Shirt Count: 110
Actual Death Count: 5
Ripped Shirt/Bare Chest Count: 11.5
Cameo Count: 10
Shut Up ~~Wesley~~ Jake Count: 6

by **Will Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 12:01 pm

Keep on keepin' on: DS9 6x02: Rocks and Shoals or ENTSCHEIDUNGEN

NOooooooo, O'brien's Pants!

by **Sara Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 12:04 pm

DECISIONS

Damn Starfleet Officers and their moral choices making me look back for probably succumbing to shoot dickhats if I was in the same situation. Sisko's almost as bad a Picard! xD

Red Shirt Count: 111 (+1 for managing to somehow die despite their overwhelmingly advantageous position)
Actual Death Count: 6 (+1 Oh snap!)
Ripped Shirt/Bare Chest Count: 11.5
Cameo Count: 10
Shut Up ~~Wesley~~ Jake Count: 7 (+1 for being the worst interviewer)

by **Will Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 1:10 pm

And into each life...
DS9 6x03: Sons and Daughters or SÖHNE UND TÖCHTER

Yeeeeeahhh...Alexander.

by **Sara Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 1:12 pm

Yeah, that was... terrible.

Red Shirt Count: 112 (+1 Stop putting explosives into your consoles!)
Actual Death Count: 6
Ripped Shirt/Bare Chest Count: 11.5
Cameo Count: 10
Shut Up Wesley Jake Count: 8 (+1 That's not how you ask to join a resistance cell)

by **Will Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 2:12 pm

NO STOPPING. DS9 6x04: Behind the Lines or HINTER DER LINIE

Wasn't there something I was supposed to do...

by **Sara Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 2:13 pm

Odo you suck. Seriously, what the fuck, man?

by **Will Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 3:36 pm

MORE CONTINUITY! DS9 6x05: Favor the Bold OR EIN KÜHNER PLAN

That a large enough fleet for ya?

by **Sara Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 3:38 pm

A BOLD PLAN

Odo I'm not kidding, pull your solid head out of your liquid butt.

by **Will Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 4:24 pm

Finishing the plot: DS9 6x06 Sacrifice of Angels or SIEG ODER NIEDERLAGE

DEUS EX MACHINA!

by **Sara Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 4:26 pm

VICTORY OR DEFEAT (god that's a lame title)

That was awesome. Except for the Deus ex Machina by the magical space wizards. That could have just as well been their original plan working out and the Defiant shooting the deflector-anti-matter-ray-emitter-dish in time.

I'm not even going to begin to try to estimate how many redshirts died in that battle.

by **Will Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 7:34 pm

And, we'll finish our tour through DS9 with 6x19: In the Pale Moonlight, or IN FAHLEM MONDLICHT

Computer, erase that entire personal log.

by **Sara Stanton** » Fri Apr 13, 2012 7:36 pm

I dunno if that decision was right or wrong but I do know that Sisko would have wiped the Borg the fuck out in Picard's place, lemme tell you.

by **Will Stanton** » Sat Apr 14, 2012 1:03 pm

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away.

DAAAA-na-na-na-da-na-na-da-na....wait, no.

VOYAGER! The Voyage of Voyager! Bon Voyage, Voyager!

Skipping the first two seasons entirely...

VOY 3x26: Scorpion or SKORPION, TEIL I

Looky! CGI!

by **Sara Stanton** » Sat Apr 14, 2012 1:07 pm

Species 84726492347682113784534827659354! I remember those guys from Starfleet Armada 2! Glad to see they're total bullshit here too.

Red Shirt Count: 112
Actual Death Count: 6
Ripped Shirt/Bare Chest Count: 11.5
Cameo Count: 10
Shut Up Wesley Jake Count: 8

Bonus Voyager Tracker
Shuttles: 2
Torpedoes: 40
People: 140

by **Will Stanton** » Sat Apr 14, 2012 2:00 pm

And, we gotta continue! VOY 4x01: Scorpion, Part II or SKORPION, TEIL II

SCORPION!

by **Sara Stanton** » Sat Apr 14, 2012 2:04 pm

Scorpio! He'll sting you with his dreams of power and wealth. Beware of Scorpio! Oh wait, it's Scorpion. Well then... that certainly introduced a new species and kinda neutered them AND the Borg in one go so... Go Janeway, I guess? Oh and somehow hose down the hull, there's bio-fluid-universe gunk all over it.

Red Shirt Count: 112
Actual Death Count: 6
Ripped Shirt/Bare Chest Count: 11.5
Cameo Count: 10
Shut Up Wesley Jake Count: 8

Bonus Voyager Tracker
Shuttles: 2
Torpedoes: 35 (-5 nano-torpedoes)
People: 141 (+1 Borg Fan-Service Drone)

by **Will Stanton** » Sat Apr 14, 2012 2:55 pm

Oh no! The police!

VOY 4x14: Message in a Bottle or FLASCHENPOST

Sending out an SOS! Sending out an SOS! Sending out an SOS! *Repeat for five minutes*

by **Sara Stanton** » Sat Apr 14, 2012 2:59 pm

Welcome to Voyager, a show taking place in... the Alpha Quadrant? On the USS Prometheus? With Romulans? Well okay then! Also, absolutely zilch was accomplished to actually help Voyager come home so there's that.

Red Shirt Count: 114 (+2 random Prometheus crew-members)
Actual Death Count: 6
Ripped Shirt/Bare Chest Count: 11.5
Cameo Count: 10
Shut Up Wesley Count: 8

Bonus Voyager Tracker
Shuttles: 2
Torpedoes: 35
People: 141

by **Will Stanton** » Sat Apr 14, 2012 7:20 pm

I swear, some of these episodes take place on Voyager proper...

VOY 4x23: Living Witness or DER ZEITZEUGE

OH MY GOD, CHAKOTAY'S FACE PARASITE IS GROWING!

by **Sara Stanton** » Sat Apr 14, 2012 7:25 pm

Black leather gloves turn people evil. Though I liked EvilJaneway's hairstyle mch better than all the other stuff she's tried to do with her hair so far.

Red Shirt Count: 113 (+3 Dead Engineers according to the Doctor)
Actual Death Count: 6
Ripped Shirt/Bare Chest Count: 11.5
Cameo Count: 10
Shut Up Wesley Count: 8

Bonus Voyager Tracker
Shuttles: 2
Torpedoes: 35
People: 138

by **Will Stanton** » Sun Apr 15, 2012 8:33 am

Alright, stop.

VOY 5x06: Timeless or TEMPORALE PARADOXIE

Collaborate, and listen.
Harry's back with a brand new invention
Grabbing the slipstream so tightly
Flowin' through the quadrant daily and nightly
Will they ever stop?
Yo, I don't know
Power the implants and make 'em all glow
To the extreme they steal the Flyer like vandals
Re-writing time, snuffin' history like candles...

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